Chasing daylight

Limi Feu sweater, Banana Republic top, Rachel Comey pants. It was cold this morning, but my office area has been getting much warmer throughout the day so I took off the sweater for the later half. Yesterday I was roasting in the cashmere sweater in the afternoon with the sun on me.

I left the office at my normal time and managed to get OOTD photos done in some daylight.

Next week I might have jury duty. I’m hoping I won’t get selected because I’ve got too much to do at work already. My answers were always straight forward on the questionnaires for jury selection before, but now there is a difference. I was mugged a block away from my apartment when I lived in the city and the guy was never caught. It’s fairly typical in the city though. In fact, there’s a motto that there are those who have been mugged and those who have yet to be mugged. I lived there for 10 years and 4 fucking months before we moved out of the city I ended up being another of the city’s victims. The guy waited until I got in my car, stood over me and as I screamed he dove in the car, strangling me to shut up until he reached over and grabbed my handbag and ran. I was dazed and in a panic and some guy walking his dog down the street acted like he didn’t see anything although anyone with half a brain cell would notice how visibly shaken and upset I was. The cops weren’t helpful either because they didn’t drive me around the neighborhood like they are supposed to in an attempt to see if I recognized the guy. The detective I talked to looked dejected when he found out I wasn’t driven around – apparently it’s normal for the cops to not give a fuck because it happens so often. The policewoman who picked me up was actually quite the bitch to me, as if I was inconveniencing her.  I’ve had other bad experiences with sexist cops and cops using their status to try and intimidate me. When I called them out on it though they shut up and acted like nothing happened.

I know that not all cops are like that and in the city it can be tough, but in all honesty if they even pretended like they gave two shits they’d probably get a little more respect and help from the citizens in general.

I am glad I no longer live in the city, but I’m still really paranoid now about going out in some places because of what happened.

Stress

Wednesday
Everlane sweater, Yohji Yamamoto pants.
Thursday
Everlane tee, Limi Feu sweater, Grana jeans.
Friday
Uniqlo flannel, Land’s End cardigan, Grana jeans.

This has been a week.

Wednesday was my 3 month review with my boss and we officially discussed my changing roles. Basically, his department is severely understaffed and he’s been nudging me (ok, more like throwing me in the deep end of a pool, which he finally admit to) to move into it as customer service support. To his credit, he asked me what I was interested in doing and was willing to listen to me. If I didn’t want it, he wouldn’t push any more and go hire someone. He’s totally fine with my staying in the admin role and only helping him out with one client. However, I do have a long history of customer service in my resume and know what he’s setting me up for. The only major hurdle for me is understanding the software program so I can get the answers I need in a more timely manner. I also knew going into this new role would mean a rather large pay raise. I admit I was much more interested in a different area of the company, however, I also recognize how much the company needed a customer service role right now and although it’s not my favorite area, I can do it.

We discussed my transition period and my receiving dedicated training and take on more clients – until we find my replacement for the admin role. After that I will go full time (I think the title would be Customer Liaison, but I’m not sure) into my new role and handle more accounts.

After that meeting I had some time to do work and we had another meeting with the client I’ve been working with over the past month.

Thursday I had a meeting with our marketing company. The woman I took over for in the admin role is on maternity leave, but her coming back now is a 50/50 coin toss as far as I’m concerned so I’m preparing myself for having to take over marketing as well for the time being. I spent the rest of the day Thursday looking through the software program and asking everyone in engineering about operations.

Today I was a little busy this morning but by noon I didn’t have much to do and the general stress of the week finally let go and suddenly was so drowsy I couldn’t stop yawning and had a terrible time staying awake.

I’ve been full on exhausted all week. I don’t sleep well during the work week because I have sleep anxiety. I must be in bed by a certain time because my mind then does a count down of how much time I have left before the alarm goes off and it sets a mini panic mode in me. So sleep during the week is generally bad and then I crash on Friday and Saturday nights. The added stress of having my review and knowing I’m transitioning into a role with many more responsibilities over the next couple months has wreaked havoc on me mentally. It’s not a bad thing, but more like stressful excitability.

I’m one of those people who always look for the end game and I’ve already been looking at the logistics of what the major problems areas are in the company that pertain to my role and how I can overcome them. To a degree, this may mean trying to work around/over someone who has been in the company for a very long time because to be frank about it: he’s fucking shit at his job and his duties are crucial to many areas of the company as a whole. Everyone complains about this guy and he’s been moved from one role to another just to get him out of the way and put him in an area where he’s the least destructive. Why not fire him? Well…. that’s a whole can of worms I can’t get into but let’s just say certain people are bound by familial connections and those connections demand this asshole be take care of.

Aside from this annoyingly huge obstacle, most everyone else I’ve worked with and will be working more closely with in the company has been beyond amazing. This is the most corporate company I’ve ever worked for and I wasn’t expecting much, but I’ve been bowled over by the amount of help and support I’ve received. It’s truly awe-inspiring that so many people will stop to answer my questions and never complain nor chide me or tell me to go get the answer elsewhere. I’ve never been in a work environment where everyone truly supports each other so much. I hate to use the term family because I’ve always found that to be cliche and ridiculous since not many people really talk to each other outside of work, but while in the office, there is a close-knit togetherness that is truly endearing.

I don’t know if I’ve mentioned it before, but I work for a medical component manufacturing company. The components we make are used in surgery for spine and joint support/correction. I mostly work in the office, but there is a factory connected to the business office and every employee is required to wear PPE (personal protective equipment): safety glasses and non-slip shoes. I have a pair of non-slip clogs I put on occasionally when I need to hand out paperwork to the people on the shop floor or find out a status of part production. I do take off my boot for the times I go out on the floor, but in general I hand off stuff to other people I know will go out there. Many of them don’t mind at all and know I’m trying to stay off my leg while I’m wearing the boot.

As my new role progresses, I might end up sharing office space with people on the shop floor since that’s where I need to find out the most information for the clients.

Car & still making an effort

So let’s get this out of the way. New car. There it is. It has 4 exhaust levels, meaning you can adjust how loud it is. Z usually keeps it in quiet mode while in the neighborhood because no one likes that neighbor with the obnoxiously loud car. It also has heated and cooled seats, which is really nice. The next car I get might have to have cooled seats (I already have heated) because swamp butt in the summer is annoying.

This is just a leisure car. Z does have a “beater” he uses to get to work regularly and for other things.

Sunday

Sunday outfit: Everlane long sleeve tee, Limi Feu sweater, Grana jeans. In the photo with the car above I put on my Journal Standard jacket for going out.

I actually got dressed on both Saturday and Sunday this weekend! I haven’t done that in… I don’t know how long. That’s kinda sad to admit, but whatever. I’m making more of an effort now. We’ll see how long this lasts.

monday

Uniqlo top, Rachel Comey pants.

This winter has been really weird. Whenever we get any sort of precipitation it’s been really warm. Today we had a ton of rain and it was 60F outside. It’s January! Normally all of that rain would be snow. I’m glad it’s not snow, but it’s kinda scary that it’s been all rain – like Winter is broken. Or you know, it’s called climate change and it really is a scary issue when you think about it and know that these conditions are not normal.

So I forgot to take a photo yesterday and I labeled today’s photo “monday”. That’s what kind of week it’s been so far for me. Yesterday I was distracted by the pretty necklace I got in the mail I’m wearing today. My friend Jenny, who lives on the other side of the US from me, always sends me the best jewelry and over half of my collection has been gifted to me by her. It’s become our thing now to buy jewelry for each other because we both have the same taste. A lot of the time we’ll buy two of the same item: one for each other and one for ourselves. This was my Christmas gift this year. I’ve been a bad, slacker friend because I’ve not sent out hers yet. Sorry Jenny! I’ll get on it soon!

Things are afoot at work. I’m doing a lot more of it now in a different area from where I was hired and it may move me into a whole new position in the company sooner than I thought. This is a good thing though. I’m also communicating with my boss a lot better and I think I shocked him today with my progress in understanding the work he’s given me. He wasn’t quite expecting me to be at this level yet, but I forged my way into it because I simply see it as being what I need to know in order to do this project the right way. There may be a lot of changes for me in the upcoming months.

Sweater secret

Limi frontLimi

This is my Limi Feu sweater and it has a secret. When I got it, there was a hole in it.

Limi back

hole
Can you see the hole? Or rather, can you tell where it’s been patched?

The hole is on the back of the sweater and it was small. It wasn’t in the listing when the seller posted it (it’s from a discounter site in Japan), but when I got it (gifted to me by Z for Christmas) it had a very heavy moth ball scent to it. It had clearly been sitting for a while and I’m guessing the hole was in fact from a moth and I doubt the seller even knew about it. My husband had no idea and when I told him about it today he was shocked. I noticed the hole when I opened the package on Christmas day, but didn’t say anything. I just thought, “I’ll have to patch that up.” Never did I think of returning it because I wanted to keep it and I love this sweater. Today, of course, Z got a little upset and kept saying sorry about the hole, but I assured him that no matter what I would’ve bought it even if he hadn’t. I didn’t want him to feel bad about it and it’s his upset reaction that made me wait even until now to say anything. If I’m not upset, then there’s no reason he should be. It’s not a big deal to me at all. I then explained to him how I fixed it. I even lay the sweater out flat and asked him if he could tell where it was. He said no, he didn’t see anything.

patch

To patch the hole I took some dark thread and super carefully sewed up ends of the hole together as best I could without severely pinching the fabric. The fabric is a wool and linen blend and it’s not a traditional knit, therefore trying to fix it like one would a knitted sweater is not an option. After carefully sewing a few parts of the hole to close shut, I took a piece of iron-on bonding tape and put that on the sweater and then a small piece of super thin lining fabric for bonding to the sweater. The result worked ten times better than expected. I did all of this before I ever washed the moth ball scent out of the sweater. I put the sweater in a laundry bag, put on delicate (cold water) cycle and used Woolite Dark. The smell came out and the patch job worked perfectly. I lay it out to dry and then used an iron on it to smooth it out.

Tags

Interestingly enough, the tag on the inside of the sweater in the above photo says: “Friction and repeated use may cause yarn breakage and surface damage. It is not repairable once it’s damaged. The fabric may pile up lint and fuzz on the surface. Please handle with care.” Translated: If you get a hole in this, you’re fucked!

Oh yeah? Well I don’t think so. I’ve worn the sweater a half dozen times already and my patch job is still working just fine.

This sweater is a used item and it’s a very delicate one. But, it’s not the of the world for these sorts of items if something happens to them. If there was a nasty stain on it, that would be a different story, but a tiny hole is easy to fix up for most fabrics, especially natural fiber ones.

 

Warning: second half of this post has an extreme amount of profanity. Seriously, if you get easily offended by any and ALL profanity, stop reading now.

outfit
Uniqlo flannel shirt, 45 rpm jacket, Uniqlo pants – in the car dealership bathroom

In other news, I spent 5 hours in a car dealership today, holding my tongue and mentally wanting to punch the shit out of the super annoying sales person who made awful jokes and clearly just thought that if she could get Z and I to laugh at her, she’d get the money out of us she wanted. Don’t think so BI-ATCH!

If there’s one thing Z knows – it’s cars. He’s a total car fan and knows how the pricing structure works for them and what’s part of a true cost for the car and what’s just a dealership bullshit cost. By the end of the day the sales rep did fuck us over – a teensy bit, but not nearly as much as she probably would’ve liked. We agreed on a price for the car, then the fucking cunt worked backwards to make the price we agreed upon, the end sales price after rebates, which then bumped up the true sales price of the car, which was NOT the agreed upon price. Z immediately caught it and said no, the price is AFTER rebates and she flat out said, “Then you’d be home by now” – meaning there would not have been a sale and she said there was no possible way to go lower because that’s the invoice price (which is a LIE – when they say you are already paying the “invoice price” that’s not entirely true – car companies give dealerships incentives so their invoice pricing is after the incentives and not the real invoice price of the car). I was ready to stand up and pummel the cunt right then and there for that. She then countered that he was already getting over $7k off the sticker price (irrelevant, you stupid bitch!), and he shook hands (also fucking irrelevant – a hand shake is a fucking posturing gesture and means nothing – the only thing that matters in the end is the signature on the line) on the price listed after the rebates because there was no talk of rebates before. She left us to talk and Z did say he should’ve thought of that, but that still doesn’t discount the fact that she flat out changed the price of the car that was agreed upon. Our paying the post rebates price still means we are paying for taxes and loan pricing for the cost before rebates. I was ready to walk out and I wanted to just to see the bitch’s angry face fall out of shock because she was already losing her composure by the second, but Z’s got a much softer temperament than I do. I’m more angry about it than him. It only upped the monthly cost by just over $10 and while he was thoroughly pissed that she finagled around him like that, he decided he wasn’t going to let it ruin the car for him. He gave her a dirty look and then said he’d agree to that cost and then turned away from her. She then barely managed to put up her chipper attitude again and said, “Normally I’d say let’s take photos…. but you don’t seem to want to…” Z and I just glared at her and I shook my head and rolled my eyes at her. He deadpan-face asked for the spare key she hadn’t given him yet.

In the end, he got the exact car he wanted with all the options he wanted for the price (range) he wanted, so he’s a happy camper. I’m still pissed a bit that she swindled us in the way she did, but if he’s happy then I need to get over it.

I don’t have photos of the car because it was nearly dark by the time we got home, but we are going for a ride tomorrow and I’ll take photos then of his new 2018 Ford Mustang GT.

As a general FYI about me: I FUCKING HATE SALES PEOPLE. 99% of them are annoying shit-cocks. Car sales people and realtors are THE WORST. I’m not like most gullible shoppers who go around browsing at things and then with just a smile and a few trendy key words will jump to buy whatever item a sales person has in front of me. I have a feeling most blogs I follow are the same way as me. We know the bullshit and can smell it from miles away. I hate going to malls and having 5 sales associates inside of two minutes ask me if they can help me at all. NO, LEAVE ME ALONE TO LOOK! I usually leave my sunglasses on in stores just for this reason. I know there is the rare gem of a SA, who understands this and I appreciate those people. Most of them are the ones who knowing look me directly in the eye and smile – maybe even give a nod – and then leave me be. But those SAs are very rare and nonexistent at car dealerships. Just sitting there today for so long listening to the other sales people schmoozing on the phone and in person with people made me want to throw up. I online shop as much as possible to bypass all the shit.

Ironically, my boss is the main sales associate and VP for our company. Sometimes on client calls I’ll cringe and want to shout at him: Shut up with the stupid flower shit-talk! No one cares! Get to the fucking point! The client he’s had me working with even called him out on it and said, “getting back to the point…”, which made me laugh. It’s always so cringey-bad when clients call sales rep out on the crap that doesn’t matter. Most of the time the flower-shit-speak doesn’t even make sense. It’s a bunch of trendy catch-all words meant to make the client feel like they are getting something good. If you actually listen to the words, you’ll know they mean nothing. It’s pure shit coming right out of the mouth instead of the ass.

Anyhow, we came home, had some scotch and dinner and now we are going to play Zelda. I told Z he owes me several hours of game play tonight for my behaving so well at the dealership. (the bitch seriously has no idea how lucky she is I kept my mouth shut…)

 

 

Failed test

Monday: Yohji shirt, company vest, Everlane pants.

I’m sure many can relate to this: A new idea comes to mind and there’s lots of excitement to make it happen, but when the reality of it comes to fruition the results being a disappointment feel like an understatement.

First of all, I’m not sure what to make of my basement set up right now for photos. I’m using the photo light I bought again and while it’s definitely bright enough, I still feel the photos are lacking severely.

Secondly, the above outfit didn’t look half as good as it did in my head. I wanted to try out a mini project this week where I wear a variety of tops with the Everlane E2 Pant. After browsing Kick Pleat and ogling all the pretty photos on Death by Elocution I thought my problem was not mixing around my clothes enough and I wanted to experiment more with different silhouettes. Well, what will I know works with those pants if I don’t take several photos of them with different tops? So the idea was to wear these pants all week long with different tops in an effort to figure out what really works. Monday’s photo doesn’t really seem to work at all – not even for a solid black outfit. I was so cold I ended up throwing on my company vest to keep me warm all day so I figured I’d take a photo with that too.

tuesday

Today: Everlane mock neck shirt, Limi Feu sweater, Everlane pants.

I really don’t think the lighting is doing this outfit justice at all. I felt much more put together wearing this. Also, the half-tucking the sweater I felt helped the look. I was much warmer today like this. Note to self: work on posture in photos. I look hunched over but I’m really not. This photo really isn’t doing this outfit justice at all. Or maybe the outfit isn’t nearly as great as I feel in it.

I’ve been eyeing up a lot of stuff on COS lately, which seems to be another version of Everlane, but with better colors and more styles to choose from. I know they are owned by H&M, which then raises the question: how sustainable/ethical of a company are they? Is the quality really that much better since their price points almost match Everlane exactly? Or is it just about the same? I’ve read reports that there are sizing issues with their catalog in the same vein as Everlane. I was surprised to see that I’d be more of a size 6 with COS when I looked at their charts. I do like the look of the clothes better on COS, but I’m wondering if this is just settling for another version of Everlane that may be plagued with the exact same issues of weird sizing and quality that seems great, but ends up being a bigger disappointment down the line. Does anyone have any experience with them?

Also, who exactly is the person behind Death by Elocution? Is she a model? Is she a photographer? Is she a millionaire or a trust fund baby who can afford all those gorgeous clothes all the time? I love the feed, but it had me wondering just how the heck she obtains all those items. It’s also highly frustrating that she doesn’t list what the clothes are. I get that she doesn’t have to because it’s her blog to do with as she pleases, but sometimes I really want to know what a product is she’s wearing. Ok, like 90% of the time I want to know. I started looking at COS because I saw a sweater she posted from there and you could see the tag on it. But I can’t make out the tags in many other photos she posts.